Trapped as a Woman…again

The social pressures on the nation’s youths have changed throughout the years, no doubt. And I am sure I am not the first to complain about these handcuffs clamped too tightly around my wrists. Fifty years ago it was unthinkable for a woman to stay unmarried, have a career, be “successful”. For today’s young women (and I’m sure men, too but I am speaking from a woman’s perspective) there is immense pressure to not only get your high school diploma, but also to continue to college and post graduate work.

A successful woman is described as someone who has overcome the sexist business world, become a CEO of some company, makes more money than most men in her field, and has an apartment in downtown Chicago on the 42^nd floor with floor to ceiling windows so she can see the city skyline. She has overcome the traditional stereotype of the homemaker, mom, and housewife. If she is married, it isn’t her responsibility to have dinner on the table when her husband gets home from work. It isn’t her primary responsibility in life to raise the children, cook, and clean.

So this is supposed to be good, supposed to be progress for the gender of women. This image is what has been pushed upon me- what I should strive to become in life. A strong, independent, successful woman. Prove that I am equal to if not better than, any man. Shun the past; a real educated woman makes something of herself rather than submitting to the confines of the home.

So how does someone like me overcome those pressures? There was a fellow young woman who submitted the most beautiful secret to Post Secret. She said she didn’t want to graduate and have a job. She just wanted to be a mom. She didn’t want to say anything though, because she didn’t want to disappoint. I can totally relate- for those of us out there who wish and hope for that special day when you see two pink lines rather than just one; we are not alone. I truly believe there isn’t a more honorable and special way to spend your life than raising your children.

Sure, some woman out there is making a name for herself by managing an entire company. I’m proud of her- you go girl! For me, I would rather have a much stronger impact on just one, or maybe two, lives. Bring them into the world, teach them how things work, nurse them back to health, laugh and play with them, show them what is good and what is wrong.

I see your looks of pity, your shift in body language. I notice the change in the tone of your voice when you find out I am just 22 and want nothing more than to be pregnant. I am no less intelligent, no less driven, no less independent or strong than you are. I don’t judge you for following your dreams; please don’t judge me because I am following mine.